If I Lose Myself Tonight

My third Happy Thursday was perfect. It was the wildest I've been. It's unfathomable and unforgettable.

Having seen you under the light of the lamppost, it made me eternally happy. It's been a while since we've last seen each other. My world twisted and turned. I was so dizzy from the beer I have drunk that it was a miracle that I was able to walk straight. A first timer with beer, I didn't know how long I would last.

We sat side by side, awkward. I ignored you the best that I can. It wasn't difficult. Being drunk, I was true. No lying, no plasticity. But I withheld my actions. I was in fact wanting to hold you, or better yet, grab you by your waist and pull you closer, kiss you on your lips, down to your neck, caressing your parts and ignore the background.

We played a game. You kissed me, held me, let me hug you. It was... wow. Te amo, beer. You've gone drunk, more or less, that it made you do actions that you were never able to do when you were sober. I cherished it because I may never know when it will happen again. As each ball was shot into the cup, we hugged. Before throwing each ball, you kissed me for good luck. Too bad we lost in the end which made us both even more drunk.

Then you crashed. Down on the pavement of the bar. You ranted about life. How you will never be successful. How you were such a failure. How you wanted to leave but only stayed for your friends. Everything went down from there. Later, I vomited. It was disgusting. The insides of me, all liquid. After that, I became sober.

We rode a taxi to a place to sleep in. In the room we were alone. We were together. Under the sheets, we were naked. It was there and then where we made history. We made love. I made love, while you, well, I know it wasn't love. I took it in and placed it in my mind.

As each kiss went throughout the night, it was, it was... I don't even know what it was. It was unforgettable. It was unfathomable. It was only for that night.